White Christmas

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Dear June & Jim: We really missed coming down south this past winter, however with the decline of the dollar and the high medical costs we decided to stay home and enjoy our first winter for many years playing in the snow. Unfortunately, it did not turn out as we expected as the following diary of our lost season shows. Dec. 8- It started to snow at 6PM. The first of the season and Betty and I took our cocktails and sat by the window watching the soft snow flakes drift down over the area. It was BEAUTIFUL. Dec. 9- We awoke to a big beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Every tree and scrub covered with a beautiful white mantle. I shoveled snow for the first time in years and loved it. I did both the sidewalk and our double driveway. Later the snowplough came and covered the sidewalk and driveway with compacted snow from the street, so I cleaned off both areas again. Dec. 12- The sun came out and melted all our lovely snow. Oh well, I told Betty we will get more before the winter is through. Dec. 14- It snowed 18 inches during the night and the temperature dropped to 20 degrees below zero (old measurement of course). Dec. 16- Fell on my butt on the ice on the driveway; fortunately all that was hurt was my pride. Dec. 17- Still cold (below zero in the AM) and icy roads make for very tough driving. Dec. 20- Had another 14” of that white stuff last night. More shoveling in store for me. The darned snowplow came by twice. Dec. 22- We were assured of a white Christmas because 13” more of that white crap fell today, and with this freezing weather it won’t melt until August. Got all dressed up to go out and shovel, you remember (boots, jumpsuits, down jacket, earmuffs, gloves, etc.), then I wanted to pee. Dec. 23- Decided I wanted a break so thought I would go icefishing, but my worms froze so that put paid to that idea. Dec. 24- If I ever catch that son-of-a-sidewinder who drives the snowplough I’ll drag him by the you know what, through the snow. I declare he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling, then he comes around and throws it all back onto my driveway and sidewalk. And a Merry Christmas to you too!